vent

i am in academia so I need to publish to stay employed

I have a hard time putting why I like making things into words because saying "I like to make art" sounds GAY as FUCK

I think I just feel heavily satisfied putting my mind to making something and completing it

yeah it's just in our nature

guys just like to be doing shit and making things

It's a mixture of that, and I really like to make things I find funny/cool

Mostly funny

I feel that

Hm. I guess its down to re-asking yourself why you're doing something then

I'm known to make some of the lowest effort shit imaginable just because I will laugh my ass off at it for at least ten minutes straight and then feel pride whenever I see it again

I do it for me

yeah just do it for you

You do not make something like toushin gent thinking "this shit gonna pop off"

most things are made for the self and have the nice side effect of being able to resonate with others who think similarly

ok but 10 years down the line, someone's gonna make a youtube video essay about Toushin Gent, watch it

Toushin Gent WILL be the recipient of slop content

I mean I wouldn't be that surprised to see something like that if we lower the price to pennies and it sells a gazillion copies for 100 net revenue

spooky is writing up the essay right now

I don't think there's an easy way to re-program your brain, and to varying degrees of intensity and frequency, everyone feels some form of decision paralysis and questions their own motivation or direction. We all know there aren't some universal sliding scales to chart yourself on, no meyers briggs test that will tell you how to find fulfillment, no productivity DNA to sequence Some people need to believe in long-term plans that they can see every bend and curve of, some live in the moment in the most absolute way. Some feel constrained by time being finite, some relish in it. Some only value external motivation/reinforcement, some only internal If you're not fulfilled, question what you're doing. at the micro or macro level, or both. Try new things, try old things, sometimes you have to force yourself, sometimes it'll come naturally. Slowly chip away at that and figure out what the fuck you want from life and how you want to live it. And every time you end up at the complete wrong place, get up and start again.

5 seconds before Rusp calls me gay

You are gay but not for that

It begins

he's giving birth

Mistakes into miracles

I am excitedly waiting for the context of such a message at 4:30 am

Complex analysts don’t seem to know what shape a star is

I dont know what term should be used instead, but it is unintuitive to call these star shaped domains

true!

I love that finishing paying off my car dropped my credit score 30 points (from 810 to 780 but you know still what the fuck is this system)

The idea that you lose value for not always being in debt in a variety of ways is crazy

the entire idea of credit is insane

The Jews must be removed

I think there is merit to a credit system, but I think it should be more based off of your past ability to pay things off on time and etc only

But who will replace them...?

Black women

Jews are vampires

so the werewolves will replace them

you would dare suggest that we make them do work rusp?

The Jews do work?

did you see that

tunnel they made that one time

I guess Epstein WAS a pretty busy guy

oh yeah good news I think my tumor is healing

The man's already thrown under the bus for a variety of reasons, I shouldn't take one of his admirable traits from him

I'm glad your tumor is healing pirate

You can't call your child a tumor pirate

that is rude

Pirate if you died of cancer I would be so sad

if I had a child it would be a much bigger affair

I would hope it's bigger than a tumor

yeah me too rup

the weirder part about credit is that it's a private system

not governmental

Is that weird

because it's private, there is no mechanism to find out details about your credit score or financial holds that are put on you bu the 3 credit bureaus

(people should also just have WAY less available credit in general)

which is the fault of the government, but is based on the credit rating system

It was 70 degrees yesterday and it looks like a blizzard is going on outside right now

Ohio goes crazy

i had that like 3 days ago

it was like 80 degrees then the next day it started snowing

It was 15 today, going to be -15 in a few days

weather crazy\

it snowed today but it's expected to be 85 degrees this weekend

it was 60 degrees on thursday, this was my front door last night 🥰

jesus christ

Did you see it's supposed to get back up to 70 tomorrow then 80 on the weekend

You might be a day behind in that but it's coming

I should scroll up

mint lives very north, it looks like it's gonna be up to 45 F on the weekend at the max

You could make a cool tunnel now

st paddys parties tn, will definitely have to tunnel out. luckily work from home so my car can stay stuck a bit longer 😝

there are steps which lead up to my door. thats about 5 feet of snow that we got within like 12 hours

so windy though taht its very inconsistent levels of snow. i know some folks have snow drifts which reaches over their roofs. then across the st you can see the tires of the cars

Had a dream last night that I hit a ramp with my car and beheaded a woman.

I wish that was me

i do love it up here. and its funny to see all the news with people losing their minds over getting snow 1 tenth of this. will be less fun shovelling out my car

It's baffling to not have a snowblower there