the-dump

Making sure he watches the whole thing

We can say you did this while the jerky was drying

Than I’m going to point at the tree

While holding out a treat

If he doesn’t get it at first

Okay....give me a 20

/r d20

@Rusp: d20 = (20) = 20

YES

holy shit

YES

Fuck off

ABSOLUTE LEGEND

THE MAD MAN

VAG IS TRAINED

look at this chad over here

Not a lucky 20

A planned 20

Vag watches your performance with excitement. His mouth waters at the berry you're holding.

Don’t you fucking

Gent

Please

what

FUCK

You don't just train an animal in an instant

Well I thought it was implied that I was doing it until he got it!

Well, do you have any command you want to give him while you're at it?

Get em

You're speaking....to the animal?

I look at him

Point at the target

And tell him to get em

You know

Like a dog

Alright, rolling for Vag's action

He's not a dog

Well than how the hell do I train this thing

Why would I fucking steal this thing

/r d20+1

@Gent: d20+1 = (3)+1 = 4

Oh well

He walks over to the tree sniffing at it, then he looks back to you. He circles the tree a few times then walks back over to your side, holding its mouth open in expectance.

You know

can badgers really be trained at all?

That’s better than I was expecting

You got a 20, it's not gonna be wasted

Ok

So I’m going to walk over to the tree

It was trained by its previous owners, but not for anything complicated, especially not combat

While looking at him

And start attacking it

Also I’ll say “get em” before I do it

Than after I do that

I’ll eat a treat

It's gonna make a guttural growling noise with its mouth still open.

Fine

I’ll give him a little piece of the treat before I do that

As he at least went over there

After I attack the tree

I’m going to walk back

Look him in the eyes

Point at the tree

And say get em

He chews it in an instant and looks back up to you.

Repetition is key when it comes to training animald

Okay, let's roll for Vag again

I’m expecting a 1

I roll a d20 again?

/r d20+1

@Gent: d20+1 = (6)+1 = 7

Progress

He steps back as you kick the tree. He looks around curiously.

Ok

So

I’ll point at the tree

And say in the most commanding voice I can give, “Vag, get em”

/r d20+1

@Gent: d20+1 = (2)+1 = 3

Fuck me

Vag is a lost cause