general

This will definitely go well

they say "easy as pie" for a reason, right?

Why the fuck do they say easy as pie

Oh it's comparing to eating pie

That's a stupid fucking idiom

I would argue that pie is not even in the top 10% of easy things to eat

Make sure to poke holes in the pie

Any other tips

use your Max-poking thumbs

I know you love baking

Use lard

I didn't HAVE ANY

Butter then…

yeah I used butter

uh, the only actual tip is to use cold butter, and know when to add sugar

I used cold butter

We're so in

Frozen butter and pulsing it in a food processor is foolproof

I just used cold butter and tortured myself by mixing it in with a fork

based

Less things need to be cleaned if you use only a fork for the entire process

Genius

now just don't burn it

Im very good at not doing that

When I bake I check that shit constantly

It's going to be a mulberry raspberry pie because I had one cup under what the recipe needed

(My family consumed my harvest)

lol

I don't have any whipped cream what am I even doing any more

Ice cream?

No

get that fork back out and whip boy

Regular cream?

No

Over.

Time to go to the store....

FUCK

oh nevermind i found some cream absolutely buried in the fridge

Not the Virginia cream

Sorry

damn

Fork time

I assume you know how to hand-whip but the colder the better

No mixer?

I have one but why would I get it dirty

Yeah don't worry I've done this a few times

The time to clean it is much less than the time it saves to use

X

cleaning beaters is the worst

THIS GUY CANT WHIP WITH A FORK

also that

Out of everything in the cooking arsenal I think beater is the one thing I will refuse to use unless absolutely unnecessary

UNNECESSARY??

You know what I mean

I refuse to use as many bowls as I should

and always annoymyself trying

its good practice to use as few things as you need

A lot of the times when baking recipes tell you to mix shit in 5 bowls I just pour it all in one

I have no idea why they say it most of the time because it's always the same

You always need at least 2

I used one for the crust

You just aren't an expert I guess

Pie crust is different

There’s no need to separate wet and dry for that

with berries, it's also, you have a bowl for them, then you pour them into a strainer, then you pour them into a different bowl for the filling, which you likely had a sseperate bowl for prep as well

“Baked good” makes me assume something that rises when cooking

and then you're 4 bowls in, and you're trying to find other random things to use as backup bowls

Banana bread is my most commonly made baked good and they really try to get you to put that shit in 500 bowls

Just mix it all in one and it changes nothing

Fraud

Bought me a new car over the weekend. 2017 Honda Civic

Time for mini to go down the rabbithole of modding his civic

Nah, I just wanted something to drive to work everyday to keep the miles off my truck

I got this cheap pretty damn cheap. I was tired of getting 16mpg in my truck now I get close to 40mpg

nah, you can still totally add a spoiler and vent your hood

Maybe

It needs racing stripes

Ohhh yeah this is cooking