general

The make a wish loot llama chariot can be a reality

Chad nascar driver virgin jockey

jockey's make a shitload of money

off the books

Nascar is aids

At least the drivers receive all the credit

At least horse races are quick

Most people just remember the horse with the quirky names

they're allowed to bet on whatever races they aren't in, and the track will only pay out if they win

And you don't die

Spooky if you buy a horse can you name it Max

so it's zero risk money they make on the side, in addition to being paid a shitload during the racing serson

no Rusp, they have to be unique names so I have to wait for Max to die

before I can name a new horse "Max"

Well let’s just skip the waiting time

You’ve got a gun

Okay

Can you call it Lennod

But then

Make it the shittiest horse ever

Feed it improperly

horse with a peg leg

I get it, because riding is like sex lmao

Cut off a leg

Let me be your jockey

I think 6’4 is optimal jockey size

Rusp

Lennod is available

YES

If it wasn’t I was going to recommend 7777777

Donnel doesn't have his balls

and is also probably dead

Fuck

Is there a Tharja horse

Also, no numbers Rusp

Rusp

What

Okay spooky

Sevensevensevensevensevensevenseven

along with every other spelling of seven

Sehvahn

since it's society's "luck number"

Okay what about

SlayerNinja

Is that taken

SlayerNinga

can you use special characters in a horse name

@@@@@@_---

sadly no Pika

AT-AT

I'm seeing a lot of Slayers

SPOOKY

GEORGE FLOYD HORSE

no SlayerNinjas

RESPECT THE SAINT

how many horses do they name after mlp charcaters

I rub the head of my floyd funko pop while I pray george wins me the horse race

There's a FloydTheMan

George Floyd is available though

Thank god

Put a rope around it’s neck

lol

Or just

Have your jockey in police attire

Pump it full of fentanyl

push it over and kneel on it if it loses the race

There is a horse named Robe, bred by a confederate

Name is Nibbler

how about glue?

glue is super common

^

Can you name a horse something like

Ifthishorseslosesiwillputitdown

I think you're limited to 13 characters

maybe 15

18

I looked it up

imagine having a character limit on a pet's name