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Sonic let off an EMP powerful enough to knock out electronics on the entire Pacific Northwest. According to GoNorthwest, the area has a population of around 15 million. Bump Reveal estimates that 3,978,497 babies are born every year in the United States. Using statistics from Bliss it is estimated that about 1 in 7 babies in the UK require a neonatal unit upon their birth. Assuming this statistic translates to the United States, this would mean that 568,365 need this treatment in the US yearly. The United States has approximately 327.2m people living there, meaning that the Pacific Northwest holds approximately 4.5% of the US population, translating to 25,576 babies needing neonatal treatment in the area yearly. Using Bliss's statistics again, it can be seen that the average stay in the neonatal clinic for a baby is one week. Considering there are 52 weeks in a year, this means that 1/52 of this figure are in the clinics at any one time. This translates to 491 babies in the area where Sonic the Hedgehog immediately cuts complete power and life support to. Sonic is literally a mass baby murderer.
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Craig Crenshaw, a registered sexual offender in Florida, said he supports the ban. The 65-year-old was convicted of sexual battery on a teen in 1987.

“I would support banning those 'cause children aren’t sex toys,” he said.
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Ohio is the worst U.S. State by far. I hate everything about the damn state. The fucking weather is awful. Your sports teams all suck massive donkey cock. Your flag tries to be fucking quirky and weird and just ends up looking like a special ed kid made it as his Call Of Duty Emblem. Your state has no interesting history, you were after the revolution and before manifest destiny, nor did anything occur during the War of 1812 there. You have nothing interesting to do there, no landmarks or tourist attractions. Your state has no interesting industry that makes it special. We could remove you from our union and nothing would change resource-wise. You are just a carbon copy of Michigan, but instead of having a distinct and cool shape and having good sports teams, you have nothing. The incompetent middle child of the U.S., right in the middle of anything interesting in our nation's history. Fuck you, Ohio. I despise you. Even Garfield fucking hates the state, probably as much as Mondays. Fuck your bitch-ass state.

This archive is read-only — captured July 2020

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